Nobody can stop you!

Summer is stressful for parents who don’t know what to do with their screaming toddlers. It is also stressful for parents whose kids are passing out of colleges. Its career decision time! Engineering? Medical? Which college, which major? – all these options (or lack of it) is very stressful. This year I am acutely feeling this because many of my niece/nephews are in that stage.

The parents trying to help their kids make the choice are overwhelmed by different career options available today. The beaten path is still the choice de rigor because you just don’t know the opportunities or risks in alternative options. During my time the options were fewer and lot simpler. That helped in one way because I was very clear about what path is right for me. I might have been wrong about it but there was no confusion then. Today the conflict comes from the overwhelming options and the need to stick to known devils.

My thoughts about career planning are:

• Don’t start the career planning when they are close to finishing K12. It puts a lot of pressure on the kids and often you end up making wrong choices. The right time is to start years earlier (at least 3 years before) and start identifying the right choice based on aptitude, inclination, and interest. That gives time to prepare well.
• Bet on the upside than worry about safety net (I know its easier said than done). Though conservative options look less risky, in the long run, given the growing economy, they end up more risky than you plan for.
• Teach kids how to make decisions than actually making the decisions for them. Kids today are very independent, smart and have better exposure. We are far too conditioned to make the right choice for them. However, to do this, parents have to overcome their fear of loss of control.
• And finally - Nobody can stop a smart kid. More so today than before. More so tomorrow than today – talent shines through the darkest veil. So, as a parent, help your kid develop that natural shine than put a cloak on it

Even though it feels stressful, we are actually the fortunate lot. We have the luxury of having multiple choices. There are far too many without any choice. They don’t get the best of opportunities - they have to create it.

Two examples come to my mind.

First is a girl – probably 19 years. I saw her at the passport office while waiting to renew my passport. She was nervous, couldn’t understand the complex procedures and asked for my help. While waiting for our turn in the line I got talking to her. She is from Mysore, studied completely in Kannada language, and hardly speaks English. Her dad is a clerk, recently had a stroke and is hospitalized. This was her first ever visit to a big city like Bangalore and she came alone to apply for her passport because she recently got an offer from Qatar Airlines as a hostess.  Soon after her school she had joined an air hostess training institute and did a 6 months course there. She picked up her English all by herself during this time. When she was interviewed for the job, one of the pre-requisite is a swimming test – and she didn’t know to swim. But desperate to get the job, she lied, jumped into the pool, and with tightly shut eyes paddled for her life and got through! I could see the brimming pride in her eyes when she narrated her story. That girl may have many more hurdles to cross but her innocent confidence is unshakeable. Life hasn’t given her any silver spoon but she isn’t going to wait for it either! She is off to Qatar to start her hard earned job.

Second is a guy – probably 24 years. He has recently joined as a head chef at a new restaurant nearby. When we visited, he came by and introduced himself. We got talking to him. He learned to cook at couple of upscale restaurants before taking up this quite ambitious role. He is from a small village in a state in India called Jharkhand (which itself if quite under developed).  I was skeptical about his quality of cooking but it turned out to be a delight for us. We went back to the restaurant after few weeks and he was again there, greeting customers, recommending entrees, customizing to our taste, checking if things are OK, all the way till we left. Of course as the restaurant picks up business we don’t know if he will have time for each guest but we can see the sophistication and confidence in his demeanor. This boy from Jharkhand should have considered himself lucky to even get a day labor job but here he is – dishing out Italian, Japanese, Thai, Indian and Chinese cuisine.

Both these young adults are from less than stellar social background. Their family is barely eking out a living. They couldn’t dream of good education in a good school. But that’s not stopping them at all. They are sailing upstream but the wind in their sail is their courage and confidence.

Today, to be successful all you need is a dream and the courage to chase it.

Now, the question to the fortunate: What’s our excuse?